06 October 2007

strummming drums

Music, a design of notes
that my heart plays to my mood
absence of the tunes that play in my head
is the absence of joy, that my soul is unfed...

I can stop the tunes that my ear hears
but I cant stop the melodies of my heart
I can think that my life is now clear
but its the note tells me my part...

when tears flow down the eyes
the heart strums a gentle string
the hum of the tune
repeats every one of that noon
that thoughts find their way
to the night of the mourning moon

when the chuckling heart
beats the drums on a happy thought
every mournful night of blue
I hear the distant drum
sometimes that is ALL I need
to change the tune of the spreading glum.

24 September 2007

Just when you think!!

Just when you think
The darkness is complete
A closed door cracks
And a ray of light peeps in

Just when you think
You have endured it all
You surprise yourself
And take another brave fall

Just when you think
You have finally gathered
All the pieces of your broken heart
It is crushed anew
And somehow you know
Nothing can really tear it apart

Just when you think
There are only black clouds
When you wished for blue skies
The aroma of the wet earth
Reminds you of the dry days
And that they are all … just happy clouds

Just when you think
This is the end of the world
To choose to live or die
You wish you could
When everything good
Seems to have been replaced
And your heart and mind
Are totally empty
A breeze of thought….
Maybe it’s the choice you make
That changes your destiny
It is always how things you take
Sometimes easy,
sometimes tough
You always have a choice
When things get rough.

03 August 2007

Questions

Sometimes, I cant help but wonder
Have I lived my life fully
I can keep thinking forever
but cant say yes or no really
a direction i seek, many i try
a few steps here, a few there
i pass a path, one unknown
and stop coz i want some more
but where is it that i want to go
at peace, in conflict, where?
what is it that i want to do
in hope, in despair, what?
Is there one answer to a question?

02 August 2007

Darkness

I received a poem by email
Its name was 'darkness'
I read four lines and well,
I dint think it made any sense.
Is it dark when there is no light
is it dark when I lose a fight...
when is it really dark I wonder
But the dark I say I fear
The fear of the unknown...
the fear of the unseen...
the fear of silence
the fear that is in me...
I keep getting lost...
I hold on to a thread
I keep losing hold
and know not where I tread...
Sooner or later it has to end,
I probe in the air ahead
I step slowly and forward or back
there is no way to know whats beyond
I think I am walking in circles
nothing ahead, nothing behind...
I think I should stop and wait
I dont know what I am to find...
I expect me, I find you
Are you me or am I you?
Am I talking any sense?
See.. thats how I feel
about what is not and what is real,
when I talk of darkness.....

13 June 2007

i look at myself
and the stories i have told
those that are new
and those that are very old
i thought i was brave
and everyone said I was bold
people say i am warmth
but inside am very cold
i wanted to be something else
and now i am in some other mold
sometimes i think i am someone else
and sometimes it is only me
my strengths and my flaws
are something that are meant to be
now i dont know if i must
like myself for what i am
or I know myself and am finding
why i am?

05 April 2007

Days of silence

I hear the words
I spoke in December
The words that spell
My days of silence…

I hear the voices
Voices from memories
That ring in my head
In my days of silence

I hear the noises
I escaped from them
Till they caught up today
In my days of silence

I hear the laughter
That filled up my heart
And now it is empty
In my days of silence

I hear the screams
That echoed in my head
And now they calm down
In my days of silence

You took away my pain
My reason to complain
And now I am numb
In my days of silence

I walk my ways
And tell myself to believe
I am happy and fine
In my days of silence

No pain, no emotion
No sentiment insane
Nothing moves me today
In my days of silence

My laughter seems distant
Like someone else’s it is
I can’t stop smiling
In my days of silence

I try to find a reason
To pass each season
To know what it is
In my days of silence

I can ask for help I know
But I know this task is mine
It is for me to live…
In my days of silence

I neither like it nor dislike
I try to know where it is
The melody that breaks
These days of silence…

27 March 2007

heart and mind

When does the heart stop talking
and the mind starts to say..
On life's path, when you are walking
what makes you choose your way...

Where does the line divide
what your heart yearns and the mind wants
What is it that brings you joy
the yearning or of wishes, grants?

Does the heart want only abstract
and the mind only material..
If that is not the contrast
with this issue, how do I deal?

Am I just thinking or do I want to know
what is it that makes me hope..
what is it that makes me want
what is it that holds my peace
what is it that makes me weep
and where do I look to find it now?

when you say your heart hurts
and when you say its filled with joy..
when you say you are out of your mind
or that your mind is running wild ..

What tells you that you are sad..
is it the pain in the heart or mind
what tells you to act right or wrong
is it the heart or the mind's song???

Now whatever makes me feel wierd
Is making me feels so, and strong
Do I really have to know which one
has me so confused all along???

09 March 2007

Lucky me:)

I have come a long way from my beginning
dont know, dont care about how long from my end
In this journey thats short and long
I have gained some and sometimes, lost a friend
sometimes I have passed my joy
sometimes held the tears that fell
sometimes let go of someone I love
theres a lot more I dont want to tell
Sometimes seemed like I had all I could ask for
but something always remained unexplained
There have been the nows and there is the forever
There is always something I dont understand
In happiness, in blues, in a smile and fears
sometimes in the truth and many a times after tears
There is a part of life I dont know of
and still am happy in what I have
I wonder at times, sometimes and always
Somethings, I am lucky to have:)

27 February 2007

Light

I feel light, like I am high on stuff
Not that I would really know anyway
But if I would I think be this is how it would
Like it's a beginning to a brand new day
It seems all nice and bright
Like all I had to say is said
And so today is a new open gate
Into a place known unknown
I am not on that side yet
But I can see it is bright
There is color and it looks like fun
And all this when it is still night :)

23 February 2007

Friday Afternoon

Its Friday afternoon
I am at my desk
I don’t wanna work
I do try my best

Its starting to happen
The Friday afternoon
The excitement is in the air
You see, Friday is a boon

Tip tap tip tap tap tip tip tip tap
Can you define the sound of a key?
Not the one that rings a note
But the one with which you write you see
The speed is faster
The rhythm clear
The tiny typing clatter
From far and near
Why does everything sound louder?
And like music to my ear?

Ring ring goes another phone
‘Hello’ was all the other one said before
There goes Joan’s cell phone
Or was that the one we heard before?
‘Oh Yeah’ ‘Tonite ‘ ‘ meet you there’
‘Tomorrow cant make it’ ‘ cant fit it anywhere’
‘Its your fault man’ ‘I wont argue today’
‘Will you make it to the game’ ‘It is still Friday’
I hear responses, some related, some are not
People have plans, some happen, some may not..
But that aint gonna be the reason, to spoil today
After all its still Friday, is it not?

Everyone has work to do
But the passages get noisier too
It is 3 o clock already now
‘hey! Hello!! Keep it down’
‘Its Friday’ Someone’s screamed back
‘And I, am your boss and I say you work
and Shut up if you wanna come back!!’
Everything is a little calmer
Only for a while to listen to power

Oh! There’s a game on Sunday that’s why the din
It has started to sound like rocks in a tin
Is it that movie that’s gonna release today
Or is it that nominated but lost, that play
The weather is cold, its gonna snow tomorrow
But that aint gonna cause anyone any sorrow.

Its endearing this noise, this day
Like its relieving people from pain
I love my work, I really do
But then Who can deny …
… Friday is weekend past afternoon

22 February 2007

Once in a while

Once in a while
I pick up a pen
Sit down in style
To write a poem

And think about what
I really want to write
So many words just to tell
Only what I just thought

I come up with topics
A whole wide range
Life and death
Poverty and pain
Of joy and sorrow
And of the socially insane
Of love that is lost
Or that’s in what we gain...
Of everyday’s multitude
Of thoughts in the memory lane

Of things that matter
And words insignificant
Of endless chatter
And silence vacant

And on and on I think about
So many things I want to write about
And yet somehow
My conviction I doubt

Am I writing to speak my mind?
Am I writing to please a friend?
Am I writing coz I want to write?
Or because I have nothing to write?
Do I have to try and kill time?
Or is this a tradition I want to set?
Am I thinking too much about me?
Or is it just a feeling I often get?

Now that I have said all this
Do I really want to write some more?
I write coz I can’t stop myself
I have tried to stop, to stop before...
But I have to write and I really want to
To make sense or maybe it is not to
Whatever it really means
I am trying to know
If it does or not make sense
I don’t want to stop… I know...
….Feb 22 2007

16 January 2007

why is the sun, in the day so bright

why is the sun, in the day so bright
and gone altogether in the night?
Why in the world is the earth so round
and goes around the sun, round and round
why is it that we dont remember our dream
but thats what we want , it does always seem
why is that it is so easy to smile
but we take so long, is it worth all the while?
Why is that the mood so good
makes me rhyme ,maybe it should
Why do we complain, coz we have to
truly speaking, nothing's so bad.. is it so?
Well life's like that is the excuse we have
It is full of fun if you want to have!!

One day I will be gone!!

I am waiting to hear from you
and one day I will be gone
I am waiting to talk to you
and one day I will be gone

Walk into the oblivion
in thoughts and in pain
Lost to passing time,
my heart and my name..

The voices in my head
will echo in my coffin
the dirt will speak of
my thoughts and of my laughin

of the words I had to say but never really did
of the love I hold that you never really willed
of the pain I endure that you never will know
of the wishes for your dreams to always come true..

I am waiting to hear from you
and one day I will be gone
I am waiting to talk to you
and one day I will be gone

I will follow the path
that I set out on for us
on the way somewhere
there is still a chance that
if you ever lose
the direction you chose
and to the path I walk
on come a little close...

I want to be right there
if you ever choose to talk
to tell you its okay in the end
and the point is to just walk...

I am waiting to hear from you
and one day I will be gone
I am waiting to talk to you
and one day I will be gone

Talk to me before I am gone
peace will be yours and will be mine
Because nothing's gonna stop this life
and nothing can stop this time

You have to make your choices
and I have make all of mine
and then we have to keep walking
and everything will be fine...

I am waiting to hear from you
and one day I will be gone
I am waiting to talk to you
and one day I will be gone!!!